I must say, I am a much different person now than I was before my husband passed away. I have way more faith in my abilities than I ever use to and well, I just feel like I am a better person. Granted I am not too fond of the person I was right after Brian passed away, but after a year I'd say I had grown.
One thing I promised myself I wouldn't do anymore is complain too much. I was actually complaining when my husband dropped unexpectedly. However, I find myself getting back into the same old routine of complaining about meaningless (well not completely) stuff. I am getting married again soon and the last thing I want to be is a nagging wife again. I am not saying I complained all the time, I just STRESSED OUT about everything. Everything had to be perfect.
I guess it is easier to say you won't complain when you don't have a spouse to complain to. I need to relax. I need to get back to the place where I know I can't control everything. I need to remember that not everyone in this world is nice and has good intentions...and breathhhhhh.
I know I have a lot going on in my life right now, and lets face it planning a wedding is more stressful than we would like to admit sometimes. But, I don't ever want to take the chance of the last words someone hears coming out of my mouth are those words of complaint. I don't ever want to feel like I didn't get to say "I love you" or "You are amazing" or "Thank you".
I want so badly to be a wonderful wife and mother. I just hope I can get back to not stressing out so much and enjoy what I have while I have it.
As my sister would put it..."Just say ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh."
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
You and your sister make me prouder each day!
ReplyDeleteMom, I think that is you...Michelle and I are who we are because of you and dad. You are such amazing parents and role models.
ReplyDeleteI read your blog entries and cannot believe how much you have grown and what an inciteful young woman you have become.
ReplyDeleteI just found your blog and couldn't not pop in and say "hi". ....and I will also chekc out teh facebook site. hugs.
ReplyDelete